The holiday season rushes upon us. Thanksgiving transitions into Christmas, encompassing one of the busiest times of the year. If you’re like me, you’ve cleaned the house and baked the feast but there’s something missing. Physically I’m ready though mentally I feel unprepared. When day to day occurrences appear out of control, it’s easy to fix my focus on the negative. How do I celebrate Thanksgiving when I don’t feel particularly grateful? Can I act as if I’m thankful without appearing fake or even worse, delusional?
To act as if we’re thankful may seem disingenuous at first glance. But, there’s substantial evidence that this mental exercise succeeds in a number of situations. Our actions often proceed our feelings. C S Lewis touched on this phenomenon in his writings.
Do not waste time bothering whether you ‘love’ your neighbor; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the greatest secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him.
C S Lewis, Mere Christianity
When we choose to act in love or thankfulness our heart soon follows. It’s a form of ‘self-fulfilling prophecy.’ What we expect leads to its own confirmation whether positive or negative. This is a powerful concept that has the potential to significantly change our attitudes. But does it work in the real world? I challenged myself to test the principle.
Over the past few weeks, I’ve purposefully sought out opportunities to thank those around me with words of gratitude. The more I look for these ‘little graces’ bestowed on me by others, the more I find. Expressing my gratitude for these blessings, engenders in me a thankful spirit. It’s no surprise that words of thankfulness lift up both the giver and the receiver. We’ll never know the full impact of this simple choice.
So, over this Thanksgiving weekend while you’re enjoying your turkey dinner, accept my challenge for yourself. Even if you don’t feel it at first, act as if you’re thankful by showing gratitude to those in your circle of influence. Brighten their day and yours. In the process, a spirit of thankfulness will infuse your heart with joy. Your words of affirmation have the capacity to transform a disappointing year into one of anticipation and promise.
Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.
William James
