A few days ago, I finished John Eldridge’s new book, Get Your Life Back. It’s a good read and a balm for the battered soul. However, I think a better name might be, “Finding God in the Midst of This Mess.” The year 2020 certainly looks like a mess for many with rampant illness, isolation and financial woes. How are we to cope as we look over the edge into the abyss?
In this book, John offers several everyday practices to regain our sanity. None of these ‘graces’ are easy but all are lifegiving. He lists the one minute pause, benevolent detachment, drinking in beauty and simply unplugging from media as a few of these practices. They have one characteristic in common. Each opens space in our souls for a deeper union with God.
We tend to lose God in the noise of our existence. At least, I know I do. I can think back to times I felt God was near and enjoyed close communion with him. These were holy moments, even a little scary, but they were real and deep. They seem to be less often now. I struggle with why this is so.
Perhaps I’m too busy or preoccupied to hear His voice clearly. In the past, I was actively seeking God’s direction for my life. My hands were open awaiting the gift of His answer. And He did answer with ongoing revelations. I opened the door of my heart and Jesus walked in. Have I somehow shut Him out?
No. He’s still here but I admit I’m not seeking His counsel as much now. During my sister’s illness and subsequent death, I pounded on heaven’s door asking for healing, looking for answers. When I thought God gave me direction, it led me down a dead-end path with no way out. Grief and disappointment damaged my ability to trust Him with the same openness as before.
It’s easy to trust God when all of life is going well. The true test comes when life falls apart and no cure is in sight. All human efforts come to naught and no supernatural intervention occurs. It’s then I hear God’s whisper in my head, ‘Will you trust Me even now?’
In the 11th chapter of Hebrews, faith is defined.
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1
The apostle Paul writes of this paradox in the 1 Corinthians 13. “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”
Belief in God and trust in Him is an act of faith. I see in part but there is much I don’t understand about His ways. Can I live with this tension created by the unknown? Can I continue to trust when prayers are answered in ways I find difficult to accept?
Ultimately this struggle ends in either bitterness or relinquishment. The dictionary defines relinquishment as surrender, a giving over or letting go. It’s a decision of the will to release control. The act of opening our hands and giving over the burden of our worries and concerns to God is freeing. This is the practice of benevolent detachment Eldridge writes of. When I put this grace into practice, my heart rests in surrender and I can honestly proclaim,
‘I trust You with the outcome even when I don’t understand. I give all my cares to you, Lord, because You are God and I am not.’
In this relinquishment, I give over my grief and disappointment to Jesus. These are the impediments that prevent me from communion with Him. All the other distractions of the world are excuses. Through His unending grace, I’m finding God in the midst of this mess. Thank you, John Eldridge for your insights. The Lord often speaks through His servants, if only we have open hands to receive His wisdom.
“Get Your Life Back: Everyday Practices for a World Gone Mad” by John Eldridge, Nelson Books, 2020.